Lesson 3 – Self Esteem

CONTENTS

What do you feel about yourself?

More on negative thoughts

4 Tips for a Positive Mental Attitiude

Further Reading

Action Steps

Resources

What Do You Feel About Yourself?

All parenting begins with the parent

Do you have a strong sense of your worth, and belief in your capability? If so, it will be reflected in how well you look after yourself on a daily basis.

How do you feel about yourself physically?

Do you eat and drink alcohol in moderation? Have you found an exercise you enjoy? Do you take too much on, never say “No” and become exhausted?

Do you think you’re smart enough?

How do you respond when someone asks you to do something? Do you immediately say “I cannot do it”.

Do you believe in your intelligence and potential? If you believe you can do it, you probably can. If you think you cannot, then you probably cannot. Always focus on your effort, not the performance.

Can you say ‘I am special and unique’?

If you value yourself, you firmly believe in your specialness and your uniqueness. You have a quiet, social presence, you relate to others as equals and with respect.

You enjoy strong friendships that sustain you when times are tough. You are able to share worries and concerns. There is truth in the old saying, “A problem shared, is a problem halved”. Expression of your worries is crucial when one is overburdened.

How do you feel about yourself? 

 Every thought we think is creating our future! Our deepest need is for unconditional love? That means to feel loved for who we are, not loved for what we do. Most of us were brought up with conditional love where we felt loved for the good school report and so on. We need to change that to a feeling of accepting ourselves as we are.

How do you feel about your behaviour?

How we behave is just one of the ways we express ourselves, and we do not always get it right. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

How do you express yourself creatively?

Through hobbies, interests and leisure. These can range from cooking or gardening to music, art and sport and so on. Taking time to develop new skills and challenging yourself is important in making yourself feel competent and confident.

You can build up your self esteem by banishing negativity in your life. By changing your negative thought patterns.  You may be giving yourself negative messages about yourself, because many people do.

More On Negative Thoughts

These messages were learned when you were younger from a variety of sources – from teachers, siblings, care givers.

Once learned these thoughts can be repeated over and over especially when things go wrong or you weren’t feeling well. These compounded negative thoughts make you feel bad about yourself and lower your self esteem.

Many people find that when they stop to think carefully many of your innerthoughts are negative

Thoughts like,

‘I cant look after this baby properly’

‘I cannot listen to any more crying’

‘What if I dont feed her properly’

‘What if I drop her in the bath’

Out negative thoughts are often irrational especially after giving birth and this can affect every aspect of your life.

The good news is we can turn this around if we know how to and it can be very self liberating to let go of these negative thoughts and emotions  Your thought and emotions day in and day out affect all aspects of your life.  Listen to your ‘internal dialogue’ and think about how your thought patterns affect the way you handle the situations of daily living.

Be aware of the negative thoughts and try to replace them with positive ones.

You cannot think two thoughts at the same time. Develop warm thoughts and always try to use positive words to replace the negative ones

Avoid words such as:-

Worried

Frightened

Not

Never

Can’t

Tired

Avoid statements like ‘I cannot do this’ and ‘I cannot cope with the baby cying’.

Instead substitute phrases such as ‘It would be good if I try to do this’ or ‘I am well and happy with a lovely baby and will make the best of the situation’.

Use techniques to help you cope with negative thoughts:-

If your baby crying distresses you and you believe you cannot comfort her, then make sure she is safe and leave the room for a few minutes. Take some deep breaths and tell yourself that this phase will pass.  Play some music have a cup of tea. Ring someone who will listen to you rant – then go back to baby after a few minutes and soothe her

You need to develop a positive mental attitude to cope with an unsettled baby.

Each and every time you think or speak in a negative way really try to turn it around into a positive thought or phrase.

Repeat the positive words and phrases over and over to reinforce them. Try to think positively at times when you are relaxed such as before bed each night.

Keep repeating and repeating your positive statements both to yourself and aloud.

Do not give up

However it is also important to note that you will have times when you are down and will see the negative side of a situation. But the important thing is to recognise that this need not happen every time. You can get back on track and really try to be positive for the majority of the time.

If you keep repeating the positive statements then after a matter of weeks you will find that you become adept at noticing the negativity that you are able to replace with positivity.

Do you want to know how to develop the self-confidence you need to succeed in as few as 31 short days. 

This book reveals the tips, tricks and techniques you need to know to develop self-confidence in both speech and manner!

Secrets To Self – Confidence

I have researched some free products for you to take a look at. You can actually download over $200 worth of inspirational audios, videos and ebooks on self improvement topics. The following products are all available fo you to download for free:-

Self Hypnosis MP3
The Dream Life Success System
The Power of Concentration
Conversations with Millionaires
Millionaire Mind
Never give up on your Dreams
Single minded focus
Personal excellence
Pushing your limits
Self confidence
Calming the chaotic life
Eliminating sress MP3

This is a totally amazing free package of products which can be downloaded here:-

Your Instant Success Library

After you have entered your email address you will be directed to another page where you will be offered an unbelievable package of no less than 249 ebook and audio products for just $37!

However there is no obligation, but these products are all related to self improvement and getting the life you deserve and this is an UNBELIEVABLE package, worth far more than $37.

This is a fantastic offer and well worth the investment.

That link once again just in case the one above does not work is:-

Your Instant Success Library

The ‘Self-Confidence’ ebook and the ‘Calming the chaotic Life’ are particularly useful reading at this point in our challenge.