Lesson 2 – Positivity

Identify & Visualize Your Goals

Eliminate Negative Thoughts

Positive Affirmations

7 Ways to Achieve a Positive Mindset

Action Steps

Resources

You want results – right?

You want to make a peaceful, calm, loving environment for your family, of course you do!

But you also need to feel good about yourself.

But what do you need to do to see any results – in any area of life?

You need to TAKE ACTION – simple as that!

To learn to take care of yourself is a great gift to give to both yourself and your family. If you are happy and content with your situation then you will provide a central role in keeping the whole family happy, and functioning well. This is a fact that every parent should remember.

I will be writing this challenge with Moms in mind in particular.

BUT, please do not think that Dads cannot benefit from this program – they most certainly can.

BOTH parents can achieve great results – together.

What do you want to achieve during these 30 days?

At the end of the challenge what do you want to be different?You want (NO, NEED) to learn to look after yourself.

When you have mastered the art of looking after yourself, it will be much easier to look after others.

So our challenge objective is:-

We will start with applying some techniques for achieving a positive attitude to whatever situation we find ourselves in.

I noticed that it is easier for doubt to come in when I am tired.

I also noticed that when I feel this way, it is really easy to forget about all the good things that happened the very same day.

When I feel doubtful at the end of the day, I use a very simple tip that could be called ‘Positive Visualization’ – sorry if it sounds a bit mystic!

Simply close your eyes( in your bed or in any place where you won’t be disturbed), then:

take 2 minutes to think about each good thing that happened to you today (even very simple things),

take another 2 minutes to do the same thing at the week or the month level.

Things take a bit of time to remember at first.

Then after a while, if you’re like me, you will feel re-energized and confident.

Just one simple tip to get you started but try it!

To help you visualize your success, find pictures of those things that you want to have when you are successful.

This could be any number of things, but for this particular challenge we are focussing on YOU and loving yourself. It is quite difficult to visualize contentment and peace of mind, but we will try.

Your pictures may include:-

One of yourself with your feet up, a cup of tea in hand, a contented child playing at your feet. ( You will find that if you are content, your child will be too!)

Yourself and your partner having a romantic meal after the children are tucked up safely in bed ( A positive mental attitude will be passed on to your partner)

A group of your friends having coffee together and catching up on gossip.  (Friendships should not be neglected in your ‘looking after yourself regime.)

A day at a spa, or a home spa day. (Indulgent! NO not for the new improved you.)

A calm mind, and a confident attitude is what we should aim for – whatever photo depicts this for you is what should appear in your photo list.

Eliminate Negative Thoughts

Your life is the result of the mental habit you have formed — the ways you have learned to think. To make any lasting change in your outer life, you must first change your thoughts — your inner life. Negative thought habits are difficult to change, as is any bad habit.

First change your vocabulary. Eliminate words like “can’t,” “won’t” and “failure.” The language you use influences the way you think.

Perform one unselfish service each day. I call this “throwing the boomerang” because all acts — positive or negative — eventually come back to you. Something as simple as offering a ride home to a co-worker is a good start.

Stay away from chronic complainers and other negative people as much as possible. Or at least get them on a cheerful subject — don’t wallow in their misery with them. Become the one in the group who others always describe as cheerful.

Make a list of the major traits, habits, attitudes and skills that will exemplify the ideal you, and then make every effort to follow those guidelines.

Finally, remember your goal is to be fulfilled in your personal life and career at a mental, spiritual, physical, financial and social level.

Our challenge is to focus on the mental,spiritual and physical aspects of your well being.

Positive Affirmations

Some people advise writing positive affirmations on paper 20 times a day.

Others suggest that you write a response column beside each affirmation and record your mind’s negative reaction to each statement.

After a time these objections should become weaker as your mind opens up to the possibility of the affirmation being valid.

Another approach is to write or state your positive affirmations in three ways:

in the first person (I am wealthy) 
the second person (you are wealthy)
in the third person(he is wealthy)

You may do this alone or with a partner.

All of these approaches are useful, so if one or several appeal to you, feel free to try them for a period of time.

We prefer the simple approach of verbally stating positive affirmations, both in the company of others (using silent self-talk) or in private (in front of your bathroom mirror or while in a state of relaxation.

There are only a few key points to remember when composing affirmations:-

Affirmations must be stated in the positive: 
I’m no longer 10 pounds overweight becomes – I now weigh xxx pounds

Affirmations are more effective if you include your name:
I am an excellent Mother becomes – I, Nicole, am an excellent Mother.

Affirmations must be stated in the present tense:
I, Bob, will be vibrantly healthy becomes – I, Bob, am vibrantly healthy now!

Affirmations must be specific:
I, Jane, will be less stressed becomes – I, Jane, am now much calmer!

Adding the word ‘now’ can make affirmations more immediate:
I, Susan, deserve a loving relationship becomes – I, Susan, deserve a loving relationship now!

Let’s look at those people with a negative mindset. One thing they all seem to have in common is that they don’t identify themselves as being negative. They would, without hesitation, describe themselves as positive people

That’s one of the great weaknesses in human beings; they are generally unobjective, especially about themselves.

They can readily be identified by such phrases as:

(a) I don’t know how to soothe my baby 

(b) I am just no good at this

(c) I cannot look after my baby properly

(d) I don’t have time for myself

(e) My baby won’t stop crying

In short, they will search for any excuse they can find to deprive themselves of any chance of success.

The positive person will likely succeed in any endeavor they tackle, providing they are of at least normal intelligence and think before they act.

Winners are perceptive!  They recognize great opportunities and realize their potential.

Losers are not perceptive.  They not only fail to recognize opportunities but even ignore the opportunity when its presented to them.

Winners, due to their positive mindset, think of all the reasons why they will succeed!

Losers, with their negative mindset, compile a list of reasons why they will fail.

Winners are persistent!

If their plan doesn’t work at first they will persevere until they succeed. If one tactic doesn’t do the job, they’ll try another and another until they hit pay dirt.

Losers always surrender. If things don’t work at first, they’ll give up immediately.

Most important of all, winners expect to succeed while losers expect to fail. Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy.  Whatever your expectations, they will generally come to pass.  

The positive person, in order to accelerate their success, must develop a strategy to neutralize the negativity they encounter in those around them. All you have to do is find a way to allow people to help themselves…to do themselves a favour and experience a bit of success.

Investing In You – The Power Of Positive Thinking
This is an interesting eBook (187 pages) which expands upon, and explains further, a lot of the topics covered in the challenge. It is easy and fun to read, and the information it contains can really get you on the right track.

7 Ways To Achieve a Positive Mindset

Here are 7 ways you can create and maintain a positive state of mind:

1. Be thankful for just having a life! Be happy you can breathe, walk, talk, love and smile. When we stop to reflect the abundance that we have we begin to see the riches of life.
2. Focus on the simple things in life. Complication seems to torture us in our lives where simplicity comforts us. When we focus on the simple things we focus on true life.
3. Try not to worry! Once we realize that worry really can’t change an outcome we begin to see that worry is another learned and useless behavior. It doesn’t do us any good to worry.
4. Show your love to someone. Love is the most precious and powerful gift we can bestow on anyone. It has this unique refractory component as well. Expressing love is the core of our being.
5. Live for the moment. We may live for many years, but we really live for moments. Be thankful for all the special moments in your life. Realize when you are having one.
6. Appreciate the experience you gain. Everyday there is so much that you learn. Life is about learning.
7. See your challenges, whether they are big or small, as a test. Life is one big exam that never stops. When we stop and smile in the middle of one of life’s tests then it is the equivalent of a passing grade!
OK at the end of this lesson we should be ready for the all important next step:- 

TAKING ACTION!!